RIP my good friend

“At the end of the day people won't remember what you said or did, they will remember how you made them feel.” Maya Angelou 

Think back to a time when you were starting a new job. How did you feel on your very first morning, meeting new people, getting settled in? Like most of us you probably had mixed feelings of nervousness, hope, and anticipation, wondering what these new people would be like and generally how it would go.

That was me in 1986. I had just left more than a dozen years in private broadcasting to take a job at CBC Radio in Fredericton, working on the morning show. It was September and the unit was to spend that particular day, after that morning’s show ended, out at Paddy Gregg’s place in the Gornish. He hosted Information Morning, and this was to be a brain-storming and planning session for the fall and into winter. Everyone was piling in cars for the ride out, and one of the people on the unit said “Hey, you’re coming with me.”

I remember it was a nice sunny fall day, and outside on Paddy’s deck we had conversations about story ideas and what we should do to make good radio. I like to think I might have let something brilliant slip into the mix, but to be honest I can’t recall even one of the ideas discussed. What I do remember is how everyone welcomed me so warmly, but especially that one woman, Sharon Pond, she of the aforementioned “Hey, you’re coming with me” directive.

To steal a line from Casablanca, it was the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

For the next few years we worked together on the unit and I like to think we collaborated on some excellent work, even getting recognized by the Atlantic Journalism Awards for a series on the infamous 1974 police murders in Moncton. But more than that our friendship and mutual respect grew. I got to know her kids and she became friends with my wife Janet, and would even babysit for us when we were stuck.

We both left CBC eventually, but our paths continued to cross from time to time, usually when her work for government and later in the private sector matched what I was doing with BissettMatheson Communications, the small communications agency I had co-founded. As Sharon rose to management positions she’d hire us when she needed specialized communications help, even bringing me to Chicago and North Carolina to deliver media training to UPM’s management teams.

That was when she was in charge of the company’s communications for North America. Then they pushed her to take over as Communications Director for their worldwide operations. But rather than take the promotion and move to Helsinki she chose to return to New Brunswick to be closer to her grandkids.

Sharon, Janet and I at Graceland in 2008. Sharon had invited us to Chicago for a visit, and we all did a saidetrip to Memphis.

Professional accomplishments aside, her world was her family. Her three girls Jody, Mandy and Angela, and the grandkids they provided.  So while her decision to come back home was for them, I saw it as an opportunity. For me it was a no-brainer to try to take advantage of this situation by getting her to join BissettMatheson. Being a small company, my pride was based in the fact that we had handpicked some of the best communications people in the province, chosen not only because they excelled at the work but because they were quality people. We were very much a family. So long story short, we were overjoyed when she agreed to join us as she fit right in. Sharon and I were working together again, providing fulfilling work, something that would continue until she retired.

Sharon and I worked together once more after that, as contributing writers for Keith Minchin’s book Faces of New Brunswick, another project for which we took great pride.

But all of that was just work. Fun and satisfying work, but just work nonetheless, and I may have dwelled on it too long here, because that was just a small part of our relationship. The important part was our friendship.

In this life, if you are lucky you meet a few people who are truly special. People who give your life joy and meaning. And more than that add generous doses of fun and foolishness, and so much more, but you know where I am going.

I find myself blessed for having such people in my life. I married one and there are a few others. But today, there is one fewer, and not that anybody is counting but Sharon is actually the third such close friend I have lost in just the last few months. It’s a terrible coincidence or bad timing or whatever you want to call it. But what it means to me is that the precious few friends at that level who remain, have become that much more precious.

In your world, hopefully, you have such relationships. It’s just that as of late, I have just been repeatedly and unceremoniously reminded not to take them for granted. Not to be preachy, but you might want to reflect on that as well.

To Jody, Mandy and Angie, my condolences. As people go, Sharon rocked.  But you knew that.